Calm.

Ok, so I've calmed down a little.

Found an alternate route to school that saves 5-7 minutes and bypasses about 8 (count 'em!) traffic lights, giving my car an easier time and increasing overall gas-mileage. Interstates can be crowded in the mornings, but they keep things moving nonetheless.

This first week is pretty light...I like to think of it as a transitional week. The only class I have is gross anatomy (and lab), plus a molecular cell biology (MCB) lecture Friday morning. The rest of the time is (unfortunately) spent doing what I call really soft stuff. Part of my school's curriculum is hard-science; the meat-and-potatoes of medical school. But, of course, they have a soft side that deals with ethics, moral reasoning, understanding patient's social contexts and all that. Good stuff, but I say its best left to specific classes like Intro to Clinical Medicine, which I'm taking.

So anyway, as part of this week, we spend time in ... workshops or modules, talking in little groups and "exploring" these other aspects of being a physician. Reasonable enough rationale, but in practice, it's really boring and annoying. I dread going in tomorrow morning to another four-hour block (8a-noon) of this crap. I'd rather wait and have an extra week of summer, then jump head-first into all my classes.

Whatever. It's just been funny, because here I am, officially started medical school, and I've spent my days playing games and watching anime. That'll all change soon enough, but I can't help but cling desperately to that last shred of freedom.

Ok, this is for real. This path is tough! You work your ass off to get in in the first place, then an up-hill battle awaits you. Talk about needing dedication! I'm already feeling like I'm drinking from a fire-hose and nothing has really started yet. But here are the good points, if there are any:

Textbooks Are History

That's right; virtually no textbooks. I know a 4th year who used none and did awesome. You can easily get by on notes alone. I personally have two and only two text-books. One is the anatomy dissection guide so I can study the cadaver better ($51.00). The other is a hand-me-down from my older sister; an anatomy atlas. That's it. I spent about 1/6 the money I usually do for a semester of college. But here's where it gets nasty. The notes, which you have to know cold, are pretty much entire reams of paper for each class.

I got my gross anatomy note packet (all shrink-wrapped and all) and was delighted! Oh, look at all these notes! It's 1 1/2" thick, thicker than a bible, and has to have around 400 pages! I realized only later that this is just the packet for exam 1, of which there will be 3 exams. Multiply that stack of paper by 3 and you have a stack of paper as high as about 3 Holy Bibles stacked on top of each other. Each page containing loads of information you are responsible for. And that's just anatomy...

Throw in Molecular Cell Biology, Immunology, Biochemistry, and two "soft" classes and you have a sick amount of information to learn, even if only by notes. And that's just first semester of first year.

Overwhelmed doesn't even start to describe what I am.

The fact that I haven't ran to the Dean's office crying "I quit" is testament to my desire to actually do this, so I think I'm going to make it.

Medicine really does threaten to consume you, but I've met enough Emergency Medicine doctors who have big-time lives outside of medicine to be convinced that you don't have to die for it. Plus, my friend from Livejournal graduated from my school and is a 1st year resident. A huge gamer like me, his advice to me was helpful.

I'm overwhelmed. As long as I retain important contacts/relationships and have fun now and then, I'm up for anything...

You'll Spend Less and Less Time at School

Yeah, my schedule is kind of crappy. 8a-5p most days for now. Later in the semester, it cuts back some and I get to come in a bit later, but typically, first semester is by far the worst when it comes to time spent at school. The reason is gross anatomy lab, which consumes hours and hours of time at school. I spend Mon/Wed/Fri in lecture for that class, 1p-2:30p, then hit the lab from 2:30p-5:00p and more if they had their way.

Spending 9 hours a day at school then going home with only studying to do is quite, quite demoralizing and dehumanizing. But there is hope...

All lectures are recorded and posted online. Most are even video-taped and posted online. All recordings are typed out verbatim and posted online. Get this? This means you don't have to come to lecture at all. And many don't. After the drudgery of first-year anatomy lab, the focus shifts to predominantly lectures, most of which I plan to skip. I retrieve the information at home and get a heck of a lot more done. Get this:

A) Spend the hour driving through rush-hour traffic to and from school, walking to and from your car, dealing with in-between class nonsense, lunch, etc to get home at 6:00pm exhausted

B) Get up, study, retrieve lectures, study them, finish a full day of focused work by dinner-time (at home) and spend the evening chilling out/going out.

Yeah, I choose choice B. You'll get just as much (or more) done during a full day at home from 9a-5p then you will from 9a-midnight going to school. Energy is important. Trying to get your best studying done when you're exhausted from a day at school is counter-productive. I'm all for efficient, convenient at-home learning which saves time for better things later.

Now, I can't practice this wonderful philosophy just yet; first year has far too many at-school engagements. But mark my words, I'm going to milk this system for all its worth and get the most out of it. That's how I like doing things and I plan on having fun!

Study Habits

Haven't figured this out yet. In college, I did my most heavy-duty work at the computer-lab, which was a 5-minute walk from my dorm. I can't just walk to places anymore. Studying in my room is looking to be more and more something I don't want to do, but it takes so much energy to go anywhere that I don't want to leave it. My 1st choice is Barnes and Noble; I can get my latte/chai/french-vanilla or what have you, and work efficiently. Then I can browse/buy manga when I'm done! There's a Starbucks really close to where I live, but I like the book-store aspect of things.

I'm not someone who likes studying at school (at all), so studying at the medical library or in a lounge on campus is out of the question. It's a decent campus, but to me it is strictly a tool for using and getting out when possible. I study best at my own places where I'm comfortable.

So I might try studying at home at first when things get tough. Then I'll see how that goes and try at the bookstore and compare the two. Who knows what will transpire. I'm just overwhelmed right now so excuse me.